you might be a redneck if.....

Redneck #1 asks his buddy, Redneck #2, to help him put a crome air filter housing on his POS truck. In the backyard, under a tree, they get the original breather off the truck and realize that they don't have all the parts to put the new one on. Redneck #1 says "Let's go to the parts store in the truck so we can make sure we get what we need." Redneck #2, being the smarter one says "You dumbass, you can't drive this truck without an airfilter, aint no telling what'll get sucked down through the carberator into the engine." Redneck #1 thinks on this a bit then decides it'd be a good idea to take his tee-shirt and tie it over the carb, "That'll keep anything outta it." Looks like a good idea to Redneck #2 so they finish off their beers and load up and head to the parts store.

About a hundred yards out of the drive way the truck goes dead. After several minutes of trying to start it, they get out and open the hood. No sign of the tee-shirt except for the end of one sleeve sticking out the top of the carberator.

FYI     This is a true story and I'm not one of the rednecks.